Monday, April 11, 2011

Back to the Drawing Board... HELP!!!!!

     Over the past week, I worked on the "research" component of my term paper. I read books, articles, any thing Puerto Rican-ish that I could get my hands on. "Me queme las pesta~as" (I burned my eyelashes) on the computer trying to put together the story of the island's history while trying to incorporate family history and personal experiences... I hit several roadblocks and even had a breakdown at one point. This was after I decided to subscribe to ancestry.com and research some family history. I can't say that I really like the setup on that site. You do most of your own filtering through millions of records. So the process can be tedious and quite annoying especially when you are close to your breaking point.
     Nevertheless, I found some documents that hit home for me. I learned that my cousin Ariel's father who was Choro's eldest brother (they were 10 years apart...but somehow looked almost identical) was the only one in his household at age 7 that could read and write. I thought that was very interesting considering that his parents were unable to read or write. The 1910 U.S. Census had recorded that the family owned several acres of coffee fields. I remember my grandfather talking about how he worked in the fields with his father making only a few cents a day. Researching some more, I found that during that time in history early 1920's, Agricultural workers made a few cents more than what it cost to raise a HOG in the US... Imagine that.
     Anyway, after breaking my head in trying to decide where to go with all of this information, I sought the feedback of my professor. He suggested I revise my paper and take another approach. My paper focused on the struggles, oppression, and the vicitimization of Puerto Ricans and the effects this had on early migration. To be honest, it wasn't what my spirit wanted to produce. Instead it was more like a blah, blah, blah, story that we all know and heard... the violation of the tainos, the lust and greed of the conquerors, the imposition of colonialism, United States takeover, and the countless other injustices on the island's people. My professor challenged me to take this project to a more personal level and  make it more about my own family history. He proposed I be led by my spirit.... Although most of my other work  now seems in vain, I welcome his idea. I realize that in order to tackle this from a personal perspective, I must dissect my very consciousness, and be willing to break the silence, talk about cultural taboos, and other social mores in order to rewrite my history from this new perspective. That is from the perspective of a survivor. So now it begins again... back to the drawing board. In order to get the wheels turning I'd like to enlist your help...Please respond on how you view Puerto Rico's history? How do you propose that the people's/ island's resiliancy and strength be highlighted? Waiting to hear back from you!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

El Puerto Rico de la década del 1940

A little more about Me

My name is Michelle Carmen Garcia-Ayala. I was born in the early 70's to Puerto Rican descendants Naomi Ayala (Mima) and Manuel Antonio Garcia (Johnny). We lived close by my grandparents Miguelina Jimenez and Confesor Ayala. My father passed away when I was 10, and I was one of four children to be raised by a single parent. Although my grandmother Miguelina (Mickey) also passed away when I was just a young girl, I have vivid recollections of her being one of my early caregivers. I remember her constant nurturing, and her amazing cooking abilities. Throughout the years I have held on to a special and strong connection to her memory. It also helped that random  people would come by our house long after her passing to talk about what a "saint" she was and how she often opened her home to newcomers from the island. I was always proud of my grandmother. Consequently, I was fortunate enough to have been raised close by my grandfather the late Don Confesor Ayala (Choro). He remained with us until just last year when he passed away at age 96. It is his spirit, his energy, and his zeal for life that motivates and inspires me to work on this project and pour my heart and soul into it. He was my personal Ghandi! I learned a lot about the struggles of the early Puerto Rican migrant also known as "pioneros" through my grandfather's stories of sacrifice and triumph.

Unfortunately, I don't know much about the early migrants of the Garcia side of my family, as I didn't have the privilege of meeting my grandfather Herminio Garcia, but I do know that some awesome photos have turned up and I have already started posting them. Hopefully, new information will emerge. My uncles have helped me piece together some stories about my paternal grandmother Carmen Alejandro (Minita) and her direct ties to the Tainos and the island of Vieques. Minita also passed away during my youth, but I remember her mostly for the adoration she expressed towards her sons, her sweet and passive demeanor and her phenomenal sewing abilities.

Although I was born in Brooklyn, I have been raised in both New York and Puerto Rico... At the age of 13 during the early eighties when hip hop was born, crack was discovered and AIDS was becoming epidemic, my mother decided it was time to venture off to her parent's homeland, Puerto Rico...she would move my siblings and me to the small town of Aguadilla, and so it began...CULTURE SHOCK! There began my search for self discovery and cultural identity...there began the confusion that has taken decades to unravel and decipher. Here begins my journey to explore and explain it.

Monday, April 4, 2011

The Process

Greetings :)

I have to admit that this is a very challenging task for me, because it requires deep reflection and contemplation. I have so much to say... yet, I know in silence many of you feel me. It's a work in the beginning stages. Along with this blog, I have a written paper and a visual presentation to submit for school in the upcoming weeks. Honestly, the pressure I feel is not just due to the academic piece, but I also feel a responsibility to those of you reading and following this blog. Every now and then I check myself and say, its not about me... its about us! I encourage and welcome your comments, ideas, and feedback. We need to learn from one another and experience is our best teacher!

I found some very interesting things surfing the internet today, and I found that in fact, there is alot written about this topic... but still no where near enough! I wish there was a way I could put this awareness on blast!!! But this blog will have to do for now.

I really hope that you are able to comment and share what you know to be the truth about our cultural identity. Don't be put off by the sometimes complicated technological issues...keep trying! Many times today, I have had to fight the urge to give up but all I could think of was the complacency of the coqui and the docility of the taino... NO MORE! I say we take on some other ancesteral traits like the spirit of the adventurer, the fighter, and the survivor. We talk about how we are a mixed people, so people let's mix it up!

By telling our stories and purging our pasts we can begin to shape a new identity, one that reflects the truth about who we are, and where we belong on the map. Looking forward to embarking on this exploration with you!



My Paternal Great-Grandparents from Vieques- Daniel and Eusebia Alejandro

nuyorican

nuyorican
por Tato Laviera
yo peleo por ti, puerto rico, ¿sabes?

yo me defiendo por tu nombre, ¿sabes?
entro a tu isla, me siento extraño, ¿sabes?
entro a buscar más y más, ¿sabes?
pero tú con tus calumnias,
me niegas tu sonrisa,
me siento mal, agallao,
yo soy tu hijo,
de una migración,
pecado forzado,
me mandaste a nacer nativo en otras tierras,
por qué, porque éramos pobres, ¿verdad?
porque tu querías vaciarte de tu gente pobre,
ahora regreso, con un corazón boricua, y tú,
me desprecias, me miras mal, me atacas mi hablar,
mientras comes mcdonalds en discotecas americanas,
y no pude bailar la salsa en san juan, la que yo
bailo en mis barrios llenos de todas tus costumbres,
así que, si tú no me quieres, pues yo tengo
un puerto rico sabrosísimo en qué buscar refugio
en nueva york, y en muchos otros callejones
que honran tu presencia, preservando todos
tus valores, así que, por favor, no me
hagas sufrir, ¿sabes?


I WILL TRY TO POST THE ENGLISH VERSION OF THIS... Its powerful!

The Puerto Rican Diaspora

http://www.enciclopediapr.org/ing/section_mm_video.cfm?cat=40

If you follow this link you can find some great footage and interviews of some PR migrants. This was the concept I had in mind for my class presentation project including the interviews and all. Its seems too big a task for me at this time with the babies, but I figure why reinvent the wheel, I'll just add the link...(until I am able to produce a documentary of my own.) The stories in the videos are very familiar, I'm sure you will be able to relate in some way...

Here

Here
Sandra Maria Esteves

I am two parts/a person
boricua/spic
past and present
alive and oppressed
given a cultural beauty
. . . and robbed of a cultural identity

I speak the alien tongue
in sweet boriqueno thoughts
know love mixed with pain
have tasted spit on ghetto stairways
. . . here, it must be changed
we must change it

I may never overcome
the theft of my isla heritage
dulce palmas de coco on Luquillo
sway in windy recesses I can only imagine
and remember how it was

But that reality now a dream
teaches me to see, and will
bring me back to me.

From Yerba Buena, GreenÞeld, NY: GreenÞeld Review Press, 1981. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Coming to America

A few things to start

Hello all, there are a few things I'd like to share before we embark on the journey and evolution of the Puerto Rican migrant. My hope is that this blog will be used as a forum to express and discuss our feelings, thoughts, and experiences as a people who before now, has kept a quiet voice and suffered in silence many injustices, prejudices, and acts of oppression. Yet, despite our struggles we are a people filled with love, compassion, strong family values and an enormously rich cultural history. 

We are a people who celebrate our ancestors and are filled with pride whenever the Puerto Rican spirit moves us... whether its a song that reminds us of "el jibarito" or the smell of "sofrito" that brings us back to our grandmother's kitchen...a tradition or holiday that makes us melonchaly remembering days gone... we still are moved, still brought to tears, and still proud to be Puerto Rican. Sadly, as time goes on, our memories fail us, we become caught up in the day to day happenings, or we just decide not to share our experiences because we think no one will listen... whatever the case, I challenge us today as a people to come together in the name of "los pioneros" and tell our very REAL stories and our very REAL struggles... and ultimately wave our very REAL internal flags, not just on Parade Day but everyday.

On a side note, while researching for this project, I went to my local library to gather some resources and guess what I found??? NOTHING!!! Not a single book, or article, or anything written in print at that library about the migration of our people... African Americans, had a whole section, Chinese, Italians, Russians, you name it.... but not us... "nada" (nad a damn thing). I know that if I had gone to the Central Library, El Barrio Museum, or the Puerto Rican Studies section of Hunter College Library, I'd find many things... but I ask myself how is this possible? Are we invisible? For me, that lack of information and the lack of acknowledgement of our people speaks volumes, and represents a sense of unimportance.  I don't know about you but I'm tired of being quiet. That docile Taino spirit needs to rise up in us and make some noise already!!!!

A New Breed

One of the most interesting things about El Coqui is that it can only live and sing in the island of Puerto Rico. Once it is exported outside of the island it never sings again and eventually dies. For "el coqui...." there's no place like home and that's where he is happiest...In Puerto Rico, La isla del encanto!" 

Imagine if "el coqui" was forced to evolve and to leave his home either "por la necesidad economica," or in search of a dream... what do you suppose would become of him? Like many of us and our ancestors, he would probably face many challenges, make many sacrifices, and suffer alot of emotional pain in his new environment... but in the face of adversity, I bet he would still stand tall and proud and wave his tiny flag whenever he felt the urge. I dare to say he might even flourish and thrive in this new land and decide he can sing here, there, anywhere, and everywhere for that matter. As time went on his voice would become stronger and his song would become louder. Soon his descendents would carry his tunes, reach higher notes and sing new melodies, who knows, they may even add some dance moves into the mix... Undoubtedly "el coqui's" strength and spirit live on in his future generations. He has given this breed a new voice, a new language, a new identity, and a new name....El Coqui Americano!